The dating game

Games. Sometimes you win. Sometimes you lose. I love winning, unless it's Phase 10 with the Vellingas. It's better to lose then. But that's beside the point. The point is dating is, whether we like it or not, a game. So many people complain about the head games involved in dating, and they want to get past them, yadda yadda yadda. But they still play the head games. And when they find someone who doesn't play games like they think they wanted, they get bored. It's unsatisfactory.

The truth is, we need the head games. They aren't just games. They are tests. Every little thing is a pass or a fail. Not the whole time. Not eventually. Just initially. It tells us whether it's worth it to invest our time, and more importantly, our feelings. Do not pass go, do not collect $200.

So I'm in the game. I'm playing my cards. I've learned new tricks. One's I've never known before. I'm excited to try them out. This game, like every game, is a little different. They all have their quarks and variations. I've studied this player (not to be confused with playa) for a year. I've been interested, but circumstances wouldn't let us start our game. Circumstances have changed. I'm excited. He's cute. He's got character. I like him.

The game has dealt me a new hand. He goes for surgery.Twice. I can't say I've been in this situation, but it's nothing I can't handle. Besides, this gives perfect girlfriend opportunities. I can visit. Bring him food. Entertain him. Perfect, if I can play them right. Things are going well. One thing I didn't forsee. Medication. This one threw me for the loop at first. I didn't think about that, and he acted kinda funny. I didn't like it. But be patient. That's only temporary. He'll be back to himself in no time. I think I played that round pretty well. Too bad I'm not sure if he can remember it.

Next round. First kiss. This rocks. I liked it. But post first kiss is scary. There's pressure on the first one, but not pressure like the second one. First kiss could've been a fluke, or happened on a whim, or just something that happened because he was there, and I was there, and sometimes that happens. The second kiss is where it's at. That one is more planned. That one is more than a fluke. That's going out on the limb. That's pressure. Is he gonna kiss me the next time? Will we acknowledge it? Who knows? I hope it's not a fluke. It wasn't for me. 3 days go by. He never calls. I certainly don't call. That's a bad card. But I'll see him tonight. It's institute. We'll both be there. Is he gonna sit by me? Show in public that we like each other. That things have changed between us? It doesn't go so well, but things were crazy. There were lots of loose ends to tie before the big campout weekend. That's understandable. I'll give him the benefit of the doubt. This round is left slightly confused and unsure of the next round.

Next round. Camping. One whole weekend for opportunities. This boy is shy. I understand that. In rounds past, I have had to be slightly more obvious that I liked him. It's part of the game. He needed more motivation. But now we are post first kiss. The chemistry is there. Still pressure, but not as much since we have seen each other since. He makes opportunity for alone time. Good move. I take it. Second kiss happens. Nice. Pressure relieved. It's not a fluke. Still the question of "so what now?" He's feeling better from surgery. It's his turn to make things happen. Time for me to step back. Gotta do the dance. See what happens. Hmm. Not much. Doesn't do too good a job at making himself where I am. You know, being around each other. Sitting by me, or standing around me, or going to activities I go to. He makes conversation with others he's more comfortable with. That's ok. He's shy. But he doesn't acknowledge in public very much that I'm there, or that there's something more between he and I than he and everyone else. Not digging that. Campfire that night after not-so-well-played day. I'm feeling kinda done. I'm not gonna try. It's all up to him now. I concentrate on hanging with my friends. We went off to go catch fireflies. Perhaps to avoids some of these stinky he-didn't-play-it-right feelings. But when I join the others around the fire, he does manage to come sit by me. Good move. It shows me something. We sing as he and another play the guitar. He eventually passes it on to somebody else. His hands are free. That's a good sign. He ends up sitting in front of me and leaning on me. Ok. That's acceptable. Everyone's there, so he's being a little more public. That's good. Everyone goes to bed. We walk around in the night, talking. Not holding hands. He doesn't do that very much. We say good night. I get a nice hug. People are still up and talking in their tents, so a kiss would've been no good. The next day, hardly anything. Not very much opportunity for anything, though, with packing and church. When saying good bye, he did give me a hug in front of people. Thats a good sign. That rounds over. Still feeling unsure, but more done. He didn't play his hand well at all. He ditched me in Niagra Falls. He didn't sit by me in the pageant, or in church. That's no good. Also, somewhere in there, I wandered in some poison oak and had a terrible allergic reaction. He didn't act very concerned for my well being. Not a good sign after all the care I took after his surgeries. Not good at all.

Today is the day after. I haven't gotten a phone call. Still nothing. I don't feel like he's puting much effort in this at all. I'm feeling more done as the day goes by. I'm still not completely closed off yet. But if I don't get a call before thursday, I'd have to say I'm done. I need some effort. He's got to take some intiative. I did do more chasing with him than I normally do, just because I undertand he's shy, but I don't do all the chasing. I am, after all, a lady.