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Thursday, August 28, 2008

Handicapped

You always hear those inspiring stories of people that get paralyzed in an accident and then find hope and optimism and fulfillment in their lives. I always wondered how I would be if that happened to me.

I think I'm figuring it out.

I'd be frustrated and bitter. Seriously. It would be really annoying! I don't know how people handle it. Ever since I've been pregnant people (especially my classmates) have been treating me like i'm "special." Not allowing me to carry a massage table. Trying to tell me the pressure is ok, when I know they like it deeper. They just don't want to strain me. I get really annoyed. I'm not handicapped! I just have a big belly. I also think (don't worry, my thoughts are changing on this) that some women use pregnancy as an excuse to be lazy. And I refuse to do that! I do get tired and put my feet up more, but I still get plenty done and keep my house tidy and in order. Well, slowly, I have conceded. I have allowed for my table to be carried for me. And since pushing myself on saturday, I've realy had to take a step back. All this week in class, I do lighter pressure. I even had to sit halfway through a russian sports massage I was giving (after arguing with my classmate for 30 min before that about how "I'm fine" and "I don't need to sit. I can do this!") And then I did end up sitting down to finish on her arms. I just get really annoyed being treated differently. I refuse to let myself feel weak, but I've had to change a lot of my habits the last 5 days and take it easier. I'm just glad it's only a 9 month handicap.