CLICK HERE FOR THOUSANDS OF FREE BLOGGER TEMPLATES »

Saturday, September 16, 2006

I love you more today than yesterday

So, I'm really in love with this kid. It's pretty crazy. It used to scare me when I was falling for someone, but I'm not scared with him. He makes me feel safe. I like it.

I've been thinking about the dating scene a lot, and how I'm about to be out of it, and how all my dating experience has shaped me and my tastes, and how Trevor fits all of them. The more I learn about him, the more I love him. The more he's for me.

I've been with guys that I've really liked, but there's always been a but. I like him, but he doesn't want a lot of kids. I like him, but he's kind of judgemental. I like him, but I'm uncomfortable in telling him what I want. I've been dating all these likes that come with buts. It's been great. I've really learned something with all of them. I've discovered something new about myself with all of them. Example: I always thought I could be a good listener until I started dating one dude who really liked to talk. I realized I can't be the listener. I have to talk too. He never let me have any input and I hated it. I learned how much attention I really do need. I can listen in a give and take convo, but I can't just be a listener. I need a listener. In another relationship, I learned that I can't be with an only child. I need him to be from a big family. I want lotsa aunts and uncles for my kids. It's just something I couldn't get past.

I've been making this little checklist in my head. I've been discovering more and more things that I do and do not like. That I need and don't need. It's kinda funny. I'll get done with dating one guy and say "Well, he was fun, but we couldn't have a real conversation." Then the next guy comes along who can have a good conversation, but he doesn't seem to broaden my horizons. Then the next guy comes along who does stretch my mind, but and can be spontanious and have fun, but he's not ambitious. God keeps puting these guys in my path to teach me a little something I want and need. I keep getting the one thing I wanted from the last guy, but discover something else this one lacks, until progressively I get what I want.
-----------------------------------------------
I've met my match
-----------------------------------------------

He's all I've been asking for. He's all that I've wanted. He's all to my taste. He's all that I love. God knew what He was doing when I was dating all the Mr. Wrongs. He was teaching me how to recognize Mr. Right. And certainly how to appreciate him. If I hadn't dated all the boys I had in the past 2 years, I don't think I would've appreciated Trevor near as much. I sure love him.